Five Ways For You To Trust Again
We’ve all been hurt in love before. There’s nothing pleasant about it and ever after enough time has passed for us to be able to move on it doesn’t always mean we’re ready to.
Often because we are not ready to trust potential partners again or because we just don’t trust our ability to protect ourselves.
The problem is trust is a cornerstone of any relationship and as long as you don’t have the ability to trust, you don’t have the ability to truly love and be happy.
So how do you get that trust back when you can’t seem to find it anywhere? Here are five tips for you to trust again.
1) Seeing is Believing
When trusting others alludes you there’s a simple way to slowly build some trust back up again… by paying attention to, not what potential partners say, rather what they do (consistently).
So many daters get duped in love because they get ensnared with things like their partner’s gift for gab or the indescribable chemistry you seem to have when together.
When you pay attention to things like the way someone treats you, or other people in their life, like friends and family for that matter, you get a real good understanding who and what they are all about.
And when that happens, you also learn if this is the type of person who deserves your trust or not.
2) Slow Things Down To Speed Things Up!
When trust is given to someone too quickly it is more often than not going to end badly.
Real trust takes time to develop because even the best and the brightest of possible suitors can’t show you everything there is to know about them in just a few days/weeks or months for that matter.
Unless you are with someone 24/7/365 you just can’t know all the important things there is to know.
Great relationships are built on trust and to get it you have to know as much as you possibly can about someone. The good, the bad, and the ugly before you go ALL IN. And to do that, it just takes time.
3) Communicate/Express Yourself Effectively
People are not mind readers, so unless you actually tell them what’s going on inside that head of yours they can only guess.
If you are having trust issues, then by all means you should let the people around you know that. Nobody worth their salt is going to stop seeing you because you are honest and say that you want to slow things down and take your time to get to know them since you’ve been hurt before.
In fact, the right person for you will take that as a sign that you are vulnerable (a great trait) and self-reflective. When you know and understand yourself, and at the same time, are able to express this fact to others you are establishing a rock solid foundation for building trust.
4) Know Your Future is Different than Your Past
I know it’s hard to stop thinking about the past events that led to all that pain, but at the same time it’s important to remember to take time to look forward too.
The future is not written in stone and despite your recent past, you are not doomed to a life of misery and discontent. You have a bright future ahead of you and trust is there to guide you on your path.
Take time to look back for sure, but also take some time to imagine the type of person you want to be with and the type of relationship you want for your life.
By taking the steps to plan for your future in love, you will not only have a better understanding of who you are, but also trust the person you are becoming.
5) Know Your Non-negotiables
My Conscious Dating Programs were created to give singles relationship skills and tools for finding the real connection and true commitment they desire.
One of the most powerful tools in its arsenal are the Non-negotiables (aka deal-breakers). These Non-negotiables are not superficial traits like: “They are taller than 6’0” or “Has a great job”, rather they are core values that you must have in a relationship for it to succeed.
Things like: “They treat me like a priority” or “My partner has drive and ambition”. The great thing about Non-negotiables is that when you know them, you have just found the relationship building blocks for being able to trust you always wanted.
The reason is simple, if you’re dating someone and you see they don’t have one or more of your Non-negotiables (most people have about 10-15), then there’s no need to enter into a trusted committed relationship because eventually there would be so much conflict that the relationship would end.
By screening against your Non-negotiables, you learn to balance your heart with your head and make more conscious dating choices. They are there to guide you. Non-negotiables will change you and your dating life like nothing else will. Trust me!
If you’re tired of the same hurtful relationships and you’re ready for the real commitment you desire, I can help! Schedule a Free Relationship Readiness Review with me here.
Talk soon.
Amie