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Blog / boundaries / confidence / connections / dating / Dating Tips / Find Love / Relationships

Level Up in Dating and Stop Wasting Your Time

It can be frustrating in a world where swiping right or left can lead to endless matches but still no success in finding your perfect match. You’re putting in all this effort, yet you’re still single. How the heck are you supposed to keep going?

The truth is, if you’re not seeing the results you want, don’t give up just yet. In this blog post, I’ll be sharing my best tips on how you can level up in dating, and finally find that long-lasting love that you’ve been searching for.

Get Clear on Non-negotiables:

Before you start swiping, take some time to figure out what you’re truly looking for in a partner. This means understanding your own deal-breakers aka non-negotiables. 

These are not the superficial qualities in a partner, like someone’s height or status. Instead, they are core values you must have aligned with a partner to have a happy and healthy relationship. For example, if you want to have a family, you can’t have half a child (so there is no negotiation). 

In my Conscious Dating programs, I show you how to make your list of non-negotiables. Usually, there are about 10 to 15 in total. Any more or less may be somewhat concerning. 

When you have a clear understanding of what you want in a partner, you’ll be more selective in who you choose to date, and you’ll have a higher chance of finding someone compatible with you.

Quality Over Quantity:

It’s not about the number of matches you have, it’s about the quality of those matches. 

Instead of swiping right on people based only on their looks, take the time to read their profiles and see if they align with what you’re looking for. 

If they took the time to write something meaningful on their profile, consider this a quality match. If there is barely isn’t anything on their profile (swipe left), this shows you their level of commitment to dating and wanting to find a relationship. 

Paying attention to these small details will save you time in the long run, as you won’t waste your time on dates that were never going to work out.

Don’t Settle for Anything Less Than What You Deserve:

It’s easy to settle for someone who’s “good enough” just so you can avoid being single. But don’t do it. 

If your match is giving off some weird “hook up” vibes, listen to your gut and just unmatch. It’s important not to gaslight yourself in these situations and trust your intuition more. 

Believe and know that someone kind will be respectful and is out there looking for you. This attitude helps you level up your self-respect. Remember, you teach people how to treat you. 

You deserve to be with someone who truly makes you happy, and who you can see a future with. Even if the chemistry is off the charts, learn how to say NO to what you don’t want to make room for what you DO want. 

Don’t settle for anything less than that, even if it means being single for a little longer.

If you’re struggling to find places to meet people on your level, watch the video below (the article continues below).

Invest in Yourself:

Often insecurity can cause singles to settle for less. Thinking that they have to take what they can get or they will be single for the rest of their life. 

Thinking like this is a self-fulfilling prophecy. There is such a thing called confirmation bias, where our mind looks for confirmation of existing beliefs.  

Break this thinking pattern by being happy and fulfilled in your own life. The more you level up in your own life and do not need a relationship to complete you, the more you will level up in who you attract. 

Pursue your own goals, hobbies, and passions. Go to an adult music camp, join a co-ed dodgeball team, or just pick something to help you play and have fun again!

Not only will this make you a more interesting person, but it will also increase your self-confidence. Like attracts like. You’ll draw in the type of partner you have always desired!

Be the Chooser:

Just because someone is attracted to you and wants to settle down right away does not mean they are a good fit for you. Often singles jump too quickly into a relationship without really screening their potential partners enough. 

And by the time they realize this person is not a good fit for them, they have already spent months or even years investing in the relationship, desperately trying to keep things going. 

I say NO to that! Slow down the dating process, and screen your partner for your non-negotiables, core values, priorities, and more. This process should take several months before you can even say you both are really a good fit. 

Time is your friend, and it will help you choose someone that will last a lifetime rather than fill a void with a temporary relationship. 

Remember, your time is precious, so don’t waste it on people who aren’t worth your effort. It may be a slower process to screen, but the results are more long-lasting. Keep your standards high, and trust that the right person will come along at the right time. If you struggle with meeting people on your level, I’m here to help. Schedule a Free Relationship Readiness Review with me here. 

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If you’re constantly wondering where you stand with someone, feeling like you’re the only one putting in emotional effort, or making excuses for why they can’t show up for you… that’s your cue to pause and reflect.

Here’s what conscious dating taught me:

✨ Notice the patterns early- Are they consistent with their words AND actions? Or do you find yourself analyzing mixed signals?

✨Your emotional needs aren’t “too much”- Wanting deep conversations, genuine connection, and emotional presence is normal and healthy

✨ Stop trying to earn basic respect- The right person won’t make you feel like you’re auditioning for their love

✨ Trust your gut- If something feels off, it probably is. Your intuition is protecting you

You deserve someone who’s excited to know your heart, not someone who treats your emotions like they’re inconvenient. Period.

What’s one boundary you’ve set in dating that changed everything for you? Drop it below 👇

#ConsciousDating #EmotionalAvailability #DatingTips #SelfWorth #Boundaries #HealthyRelationships #DatingAdvice #LoveYourself #RelationshipGoals #MindfulDating #SelfLove #Dating2025 #EmotionalIntelligence #KnowYourWorth #RelationshipBoundaries
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If you’re constantly wondering where you stand with someone, feeling like you’re the only one putting in emotional effort, or making excuses for why they can’t show up for you… that’s your cue to pause and reflect. Here’s what conscious dating taught me: ✨ Notice the patterns early- Are they consistent with their words AND actions? Or do you find yourself analyzing mixed signals? ✨Your emotional needs aren’t “too much”- Wanting deep conversations, genuine connection, and emotional presence is normal and healthy ✨ Stop trying to earn basic respect- The right person won’t make you feel like you’re auditioning for their love ✨ Trust your gut- If something feels off, it probably is. Your intuition is protecting you You deserve someone who’s excited to know your heart, not someone who treats your emotions like they’re inconvenient. Period. What’s one boundary you’ve set in dating that changed everything for you? Drop it below 👇 #ConsciousDating #EmotionalAvailability #DatingTips #SelfWorth #Boundaries #HealthyRelationships #DatingAdvice #LoveYourself #RelationshipGoals #MindfulDating #SelfLove #Dating2025 #EmotionalIntelligence #KnowYourWorth #RelationshipBoundaries
11 hours ago
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1/5
As a dating coach who’s worked with thousands of clients over the years, I can tell you that the three-month relationship pattern is one of the most common issues I see.⁠
⁠
You meet someone, everything feels magical, and you’re convinced this could be “the one.” Then, like clockwork, around month three, something shifts. The spark fades, doubts creep in, and before you know it, you’re single again, wondering what went wrong.⁠
⁠
If this sounds like your dating story on repeat, I want you to know that you’re not broken, and you’re definitely not alone.⁠
⁠
There are very real psychological and biological reasons why this keeps happening, and once you understand them, you can start making different choices.⁠
⁠
Read the full article to discover what is literally working against you in early stages of dating (and how to outsmart it) ⁠
⁠
https://amiethedatingcoach.com/why-relationships-end-at-3-months-and-what-to-do/⁠
⁠
#3monthfizzle #relationshipbreakup #datingpattern #threemonthpattern #breakthecycle #datingadvice #datingtips
amiethedatingcoach
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As a dating coach who’s worked with thousands of clients over the years, I can tell you that the three-month relationship pattern is one of the most common issues I see.⁠ ⁠ You meet someone, everything feels magical, and you’re convinced this could be “the one.” Then, like clockwork, around month three, something shifts. The spark fades, doubts creep in, and before you know it, you’re single again, wondering what went wrong.⁠ ⁠ If this sounds like your dating story on repeat, I want you to know that you’re not broken, and you’re definitely not alone.⁠ ⁠ There are very real psychological and biological reasons why this keeps happening, and once you understand them, you can start making different choices.⁠ ⁠ Read the full article to discover what is literally working against you in early stages of dating (and how to outsmart it) ⁠ ⁠ https://amiethedatingcoach.com/why-relationships-end-at-3-months-and-what-to-do/⁠ ⁠ #3monthfizzle #relationshipbreakup #datingpattern #threemonthpattern #breakthecycle #datingadvice #datingtips
6 days ago
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Happy 13th Anniversary to us! 🎉❤️

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We’ve proven that the best journeys are the ones we take hand in hand, and the most beautiful memories are the ones we create together.

Here’s to 13 amazing years of marriage and a love that keeps growing stronger with every new experience we share. Thank you for being my favorite adventure partner, my best friend, and the love of my life. 🫶

Every love story is beautiful, but ours is my absolute favorite! 💕

Cheers to us and to all the incredible memories still waiting for us! 🥂✨​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

#13yearsstrong #13thanniversary #anniversarypost #marriedlife #loveofmylife #adventurepartner #soulmate #myforever #husbandandwife #marriagegoals
Happy 13th Anniversary to us! 🎉❤️

Thirteen years ago, we promised each other a lifetime of love and adventure and wow, have we delivered on that promise!

We’ve proven that the best journeys are the ones we take hand in hand, and the most beautiful memories are the ones we create together.

Here’s to 13 amazing years of marriage and a love that keeps growing stronger with every new experience we share. Thank you for being my favorite adventure partner, my best friend, and the love of my life. 🫶

Every love story is beautiful, but ours is my absolute favorite! 💕

Cheers to us and to all the incredible memories still waiting for us! 🥂✨​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

#13yearsstrong #13thanniversary #anniversarypost #marriedlife #loveofmylife #adventurepartner #soulmate #myforever #husbandandwife #marriagegoals
amiethedatingcoach
amiethedatingcoach
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Happy 13th Anniversary to us! 🎉❤️ Thirteen years ago, we promised each other a lifetime of love and adventure and wow, have we delivered on that promise! We’ve proven that the best journeys are the ones we take hand in hand, and the most beautiful memories are the ones we create together. Here’s to 13 amazing years of marriage and a love that keeps growing stronger with every new experience we share. Thank you for being my favorite adventure partner, my best friend, and the love of my life. 🫶 Every love story is beautiful, but ours is my absolute favorite! 💕 Cheers to us and to all the incredible memories still waiting for us! 🥂✨​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ #13yearsstrong #13thanniversary #anniversarypost #marriedlife #loveofmylife #adventurepartner #soulmate #myforever #husbandandwife #marriagegoals
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The Fine Line Between Compassion and Self-Abandonment

Learning to recognize when your empathy becomes self-sacrifice. It took me years to understand that constantly putting someone else’s needs before my own wasn’t love...it was a pattern that led to resentment and losing myself in the process. 

Real love doesn’t require you to abandon who you are. Sometimes the most compassionate thing you can do is maintain your boundaries and not enable harmful behavior. 

Growth means learning that you can care deeply for someone without sacrificing your own well-being.

#selflove #boundaries #relationships #codependency #personalgrowth #healing #mentalhealth #selfcare #emotionalhealth #relationshippatterns #peoplepleasing #selfworth #healthyrelationships #innerwork #therapy #selfawareness #growth #love #wellness #mindset #recovery #selfcompassion #boundaries matter #healingjourney #relationshiphealing
amiethedatingcoach
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The Fine Line Between Compassion and Self-Abandonment Learning to recognize when your empathy becomes self-sacrifice. It took me years to understand that constantly putting someone else’s needs before my own wasn’t love...it was a pattern that led to resentment and losing myself in the process. Real love doesn’t require you to abandon who you are. Sometimes the most compassionate thing you can do is maintain your boundaries and not enable harmful behavior. Growth means learning that you can care deeply for someone without sacrificing your own well-being. #selflove #boundaries #relationships #codependency #personalgrowth #healing #mentalhealth #selfcare #emotionalhealth #relationshippatterns #peoplepleasing #selfworth #healthyrelationships #innerwork #therapy #selfawareness #growth #love #wellness #mindset #recovery #selfcompassion #boundaries matter #healingjourney #relationshiphealing
2 weeks ago
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Misunderstandings will happen. Conflict will happen. That’s part of being human. You can explain yourself, open your heart, and speak your truth but you can’t control how others receive it. If someone chooses to walk away even after you’ve tried to explain yourself... let them. 

Their departure isn’t your failure…it’s their choice. Your peace isn’t found in making everyone understand you; it’s in knowing you showed up authentically. Some doors are meant to close so better ones can open. Trust the process. Trust yourself. 

#LetThemTheory #PersonalGrowth #Boundaries #SelfLove​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​
amiethedatingcoach
amiethedatingcoach
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Follow
Misunderstandings will happen. Conflict will happen. That’s part of being human. You can explain yourself, open your heart, and speak your truth but you can’t control how others receive it. If someone chooses to walk away even after you’ve tried to explain yourself... let them. Their departure isn’t your failure…it’s their choice. Your peace isn’t found in making everyone understand you; it’s in knowing you showed up authentically. Some doors are meant to close so better ones can open. Trust the process. Trust yourself. #LetThemTheory #PersonalGrowth #Boundaries #SelfLove​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​
2 weeks ago
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5/5
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