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Blog / connections / dating / Dating Tips / Find Love / Relationships

What’s the Difference Between Lust and Love? How to Pick a Lasting Connection

We’ve all experienced it: that weak-in-the-knees, heart-pounding, can’t-eat, can’t-sleep kind of infatuation. It’s exciting and thrilling, and you just can’t get enough. Is it love, or is it lust? Though they may feel similar, there are actually some key differences between the two emotions.

Love is a feeling of strong affection and strong passion in a relationship. When you’re in love, you want to spend time with the person and get to know them better than just the physical chemistry. You care about their happiness and well-being, and you’re willing to sacrifice your own needs for theirs. Love is usually built on a foundation of trust and mutual respect.

Lust, on the other hand, is often mistaken for love but it is actually something completely different. Lust is defined as a strong sexual desire. When you feel lust for someone, you are physically attracted to them and you want to have sex with. Lust is often physical and it is not always based on an emotional connection. Lust is also very temporary.

In this blog post, I will discuss the difference between lust and love and help you figure out which one you are feeling!

As a Dating Coach, I often work with singles that get sucked into lust, thinking they have fallen in love.

Love is usually a slower burn that grows over time, while lust is often more immediate and intense. Of course, there are also different consequences to each emotion. Love typically leads to lasting happiness and satisfaction, while lust often fizzles out quickly and can leave us feeling empty and unfulfilled.

In my Conscious Dating Programs, I discuss the value of combined requirements aka non-negotiables that lead to lasting love. These are core values and belief systems you must have in common with your partner in order for the relationship to be harmonious.

I personally have found these to be what makes a loving, understood, and accepting relationship. In order to find your perfect match, it is essential that you know what your own personal combined requirements are.

What values and beliefs do you hold dear to your heart? What would you absolutely not be willing to compromise on? Once you know this, it becomes much easier to disqualify potential partners who do not meet your requirements.

This doesn’t mean that you should be inflexible; rather, it means that you should only enter into relationships with those who share your core values. Otherwise, you’re likely to end up feeling frustrated and misunderstood. So take some time to figure out what your combined requirements are; it will save you a lot of heartache in the long run!

The biggest mistake is when singles make lifetime decisions based on ONLY the chemistry they feel.

Jumping in too quickly, most singles find out that after the chemicals and hormones wear off after the honeymoon phase is over. A person then realizes they have no common values with their partner. Because there is nothing to keep the deep connection moving forward, they soon discover their non-negotiables are not met in a relationship and leave because they are happier alone.

Often, we find ourselves attracted to the wrong type of person, or we end up getting hurt even though we thought we were being careful. If you’ve been through this cycle more than once, it might be time to re-evaluate how you choose your partners.

Being intentional and mindful of the reason why you’re picking someone is key. Taking time to vet a person will help you eliminate wasting your heart and emotions on the wrong partner. It’s important to remember that finding the right person takes time, so don’t be discouraged if it doesn’t happen overnight. Be patient, stay positive, and trust that the right person will come along when the time is right.

Are you wondering if the relationship is right? Check out this video. [article continued below]

 

Many of us were not taught to be mindful of why we are entering a relationship.

According to a recent study, couples tend to go through different stages of love over the course of their relationship. The study, which was published in the journal Frontiers in Psychology, found that after six months, couples tend to move on from the initial “bonding” stage. This may be why most relationships end around the 3 to the 6-month mark.

The researchers explain that the early stages of romantic love, which are characterized by stress. This research provides new insight into the different stages of love that couples may experience over time. It also highlights the importance of communication and understanding in relationships, as these can help couples to navigate these different stages successfully.

Most singles throw darts when it comes to finding a partner with little or no conflict resolution skills. They don’t know how to move forward from the challenge when conflict arises. This may be the reason the divorce rate is so high.

The good news is that you don’t have to be part of that statistic. You can take the time to work on getting clear about your requirements, needs, and vision with an ideal partner and learn the relationship skills that will help you create a lasting relationship.

Knowing this information will help you screen and pick someone who can actually meet your needs. And even if there is conflict, you know how to apply healthy communication skills to resolve your problems or trust your choices on when to walk away. By taking these measures, you can find a partner that you’re compatible with and who will be there for you through the ups and downs of life.

Now that we know the difference between lust and love, let me know what you are usually finding yourself falling for below! If you would like to learn more about how to have more clarity on how to pick a partner so that you can have a healthy relationship, schedule a Free Relationship Readiness Review here.

 

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2026 is bringing some exciting new dating trends you’ll want to know about! 

@cosmopolitan Magazine rounded up the top ones to pay attention to this year and I am truly honored to have my thoughts included alongside such talented relationship professionals. I hope these insights serve you well!💕

Link: https://www.cosmopolitan.com/relationships/a70315121/dating-trends-2026

#datingtrends2026 #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #redflags #cosmopolitan
2026 is bringing some exciting new dating trends you’ll want to know about! 

@cosmopolitan Magazine rounded up the top ones to pay attention to this year and I am truly honored to have my thoughts included alongside such talented relationship professionals. I hope these insights serve you well!💕

Link: https://www.cosmopolitan.com/relationships/a70315121/dating-trends-2026

#datingtrends2026 #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #redflags #cosmopolitan
2026 is bringing some exciting new dating trends you’ll want to know about! 

@cosmopolitan Magazine rounded up the top ones to pay attention to this year and I am truly honored to have my thoughts included alongside such talented relationship professionals. I hope these insights serve you well!💕

Link: https://www.cosmopolitan.com/relationships/a70315121/dating-trends-2026

#datingtrends2026 #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #redflags #cosmopolitan
2026 is bringing some exciting new dating trends you’ll want to know about! 

@cosmopolitan Magazine rounded up the top ones to pay attention to this year and I am truly honored to have my thoughts included alongside such talented relationship professionals. I hope these insights serve you well!💕

Link: https://www.cosmopolitan.com/relationships/a70315121/dating-trends-2026

#datingtrends2026 #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #redflags #cosmopolitan
2026 is bringing some exciting new dating trends you’ll want to know about! 

@cosmopolitan Magazine rounded up the top ones to pay attention to this year and I am truly honored to have my thoughts included alongside such talented relationship professionals. I hope these insights serve you well!💕

Link: https://www.cosmopolitan.com/relationships/a70315121/dating-trends-2026

#datingtrends2026 #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #redflags #cosmopolitan
2026 is bringing some exciting new dating trends you’ll want to know about! 

@cosmopolitan Magazine rounded up the top ones to pay attention to this year and I am truly honored to have my thoughts included alongside such talented relationship professionals. I hope these insights serve you well!💕

Link: https://www.cosmopolitan.com/relationships/a70315121/dating-trends-2026

#datingtrends2026 #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #redflags #cosmopolitan
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2026 is bringing some exciting new dating trends you’ll want to know about! @cosmopolitan Magazine rounded up the top ones to pay attention to this year and I am truly honored to have my thoughts included alongside such talented relationship professionals. I hope these insights serve you well!💕 Link: https://www.cosmopolitan.com/relationships/a70315121/dating-trends-2026 #datingtrends2026 #datingadviceformen #datingadviceforwomen #redflags #cosmopolitan
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Happy Valentine’s to the love of my life, the best dog dad, and one of the most amazing humans I know. I love you more than words ❤️.
Happy Valentine’s to the love of my life, the best dog dad, and one of the most amazing humans I know. I love you more than words ❤️.
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Happy Valentine’s to the love of my life, the best dog dad, and one of the most amazing humans I know. I love you more than words ❤️.
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Comment with the one that feels most relatable. 

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If these hard truths made you feel uncomfortable, then it’s working. 

Comment with the one that feels most relatable. 

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Comment with the one that feels most relatable. 

#datingwithapurpose #consciousdating #neversettleforless #toxicrelationships
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Comment with the one that feels most relatable. 

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