Tips for Successfully Dating After 50
As a Relationship Coach, my clientele is a very diverse one, with men and women from all over the world of different races, and socioeconomic backgrounds, but it’s their age, which is of particular importance. The reasons are pretty simple, I mean, wouldn’t we all agree that a woman of 23 is going to have a much different dating life than say someone in their 60’s.
That is why I want to take a moment to reach out and write about a group that often gets lost in this someone youth-driven culture: daters over 50. So here are my top 5 tips for dating over 50.
Embrace and Understand Modern Dating Practices
Did you know that according to a recent study, the fastest-growing group of online daters is actually over 50. The dating over 50 crowd is alive and well in the digital world, the problem is they don’t always understand (or want to understand) the rules of dating on the digital road.
Some don’t take the time to do the research, some are too trusting, and some, well they just didn’t trust their instincts that have steered them well all these years. Effective dating over 50 can and should include an online presence, but when doing so it means doing so cautiously and astutely.
Step Out of Your Comfort Zone
Know what you like and don’t like is perfectly ok in the dating world. But when fail to ever push the boundaries on experiencing new things it can really affect your dating success.
Finding someone to spend the rest of your life with should be a fun process that takes you into a world you have never been so why shouldn’t dating be a precursor to that.
That means if a potential suitor wants to take you on a date somewhere new, like indoor skydiving, or cheese making, then you know what, do it. And when you do, an amazing thing may happen along the way, you might actually enjoy it.
Live in the Present, Own Your Story
As someone who has spent over half a century on this earth, your experiences are a plenty. Some of them were wonderful, some you just wish you could forget. They key to successful dating is to always accept where you came from and enjoy where you are going.
That means if you recently came out of a tough divorce, it’s important to own your experience. There is no shame in ending an unhappy marriage. Divorce doesn’t define you, but sharing the lessons you’ve learned does matter when it comes to dating.
Placing blame or not talking about what you’ve learned can be a major red flag and turn off to the person you’re dating. It’s time to be confident about the lessons learned, take accountability to show the other person that your goal is not to make the same mistakes again.
And most importantly, don’t bring your past relationship insecurities into your new one. Stay PRESENT, this is a new person you’re dating…not your ex!
It’s ALL About Being Vulnerable
Part of what happens to most of us as we get older if that we confuse life-living with actual life-learning. Far too many people over 50 come to me thinking they have most of the answers, but are missing that one thing that will lead them to finding true love.
The fact is that most daters over 50 don’t Some hire me and soon realize that they don’t know as much as they think they know, and some unfortunately never find that vulnerable side of themselves that says those magic words, “Maybe I don’t know as much as I think I know.”
Lose Those Limiting Beliefs
It’s not that surprising to me, when I hear daters over 50 say thing like, “I am too old to find someone good” or “Dating is just too hard when you’re my age.”
These are called limiting beliefs which are negative stories we tell ourselves that in reality aren’t true at all and are as crippling to a dater as the playing field of the dating game does change as we age, but the rules don’t.
Most of us don’t have coping skills to deal with negativity nor do we realize we have a choice when it comes to managing our mindset.
We let our thoughts drive us, that is why in my Conscious Dating Programs I have a powerful section dedicated on helping singles “Lose their Limiting Beliefs”. With the right tools we can learn to drive our thoughts, rather than let our negative thoughts drive our life choices
If you have questions, I’m here to help. Click here to schedule a Free Relationship Readiness Review with me where we discuss your personal challenges and how to overcome them. I look forward to talking with you.