Online Dating Tips that Make a Soul Connection

The Coronavirus has completely transformed the dating landscape for the foreseeable future. Being home alone or with close friends and family will likely be the norm for some time. That being said, your dating life does not have to stop entirely.

That’s because the online dating space is still here and our new normal makes online dating the perfect platform for meeting fellow singles. Dating websites and dating apps allow you to search for your life partner in the comforts of your own home without having to worry about exposing yourself to this dangerous virus.

Most people don’t realize that online dating is not just the process of searching, connecting, and praying you to hit the jackpot. The key for success is to arm yourself with the tools that will allow you to weed out the players, non-committals, and scammers and draw in the quality individuals who offer you the forever relationship you have always dreamed of. That is what I did and I’m now nearing a decade with my dream guy. To get you started here are some of my most impactful tips for finding dating success online.

Your Profile Matters

Start thinking of your online dating profile the same way you would if you were posting to hire someone for a job. Unromantic, sure, but when job hunters want to find the best and brightest applicants, they make sure they do it right? You need to do the same, so take it very seriously and make sure you maximize your chances for a connection. This can be done not by winging it, rather sticking with what works.

For example, did you know that there’s actually an optimum number of photos to have on your profile? That number is five, and the photos you pick during that time can make or break someone’s interests? And did you also know that over 90% of men like it when a woman reaches out to them first?

How about the fact that certain words you use or don’t use, in your profile dramatically effect if people will be interested in you? Phrases like, “I’m new to this so here goes…” or “impress me” can be like online dating kryptonite, while words like “preceptive” or “sweet” or even having the word “guacamole” in your profile can cause a connection uptick. Hence why I teach a class on how to make your profile irresistible online to many singles so they can get the best results online dating.

Video Chat is Here and Now

Since meeting in person right away may not be an option so plan to do video chats when you are ready to meet. If the person you are meeting with says they do not have the ability to video chat you may want to consider moving on. Your time is valuable, and you should spend it with the people whom you can screen in or out quickly.

Imagine you spend the next few weeks chatting with someone on the phone and when you finally meet, they don’t look anything like the photos you’ve seen. What a waste of time. Another note about video chatting is to make sure you remember that those can be recorded on the other end. That means whatever you say or do can be sent out into the world wide web with one click. To combat this just make sure you don’t reveal any personal information that can lead to identity theft and also keep things as “G” rated as possible.

Know your Non-negotiables

One reason so many singles remain that way for so long is that they have not done the work to know what they actually want in a partner. Everyone thinks they do, but I am here to tell you that almost certainly you do not. Unless you have actually sat down and made your Non-negotiable list that is. These Non-negotiables are core values that you must have in a relationship or that relationship will fail every time. Most people have about 10-15 and they are not things like how tall someone is or how old or what car they drive.

No, Non-negotiables dig deep into the root of what you want out of a partner and out of life. For example, you may want someone who has a job, but what if you met a guy who had no job, but had many before and now has a real plan in life, was ambitious, and showed signs of being a real hard worker? If so, a job is not a Non-Negotiable, but ambition is.

Similarly, if you want kids and the person you are chatting with says he is not sure, well you have a very clear Non-negotiable and clearly you can’t even consider wasting time with this person since if he ends up not wanting kids, in the end, you will have wasted all that time. Know your Non-negotiables and you will almost be guaranteed to never date the wrong person again.

What are the best sites for you

There is no one site that is perfect for any one person, but there are sites that are best for you. The key is to do the research and to test out numerous sites at once. Some are good for people who like writing long emails and some are quicker conversation styles for the instant gratification types.

Personally, if you have the financial resources, focus on the sites that ask you to pay for profiles. The reason is simple when a man is willing to pay a dating site to put up a profile, he is telling you he willing to invest in his dating life. Basically, he is putting his money where his heart is. This is not a guarantee that he is not someone who is disingenuous about his interest in finding love, but it does tell you something. Part of your process in finding the best people to date and the best sites for you is to do the research, ask the right questions, and always, always pay attention to what is best for you.

Date with Your Head, Slow Down on Your Heart

This is going to be a tough time for all of us. Isolation can lead us to covet being desired and wanted more than ever. This kind of desire can feel wonderful but cause irrevocable damage to you down the road. The concept of Love Bombing may be a new dating term, but for centuries it has destroyed the lives of far too many singles.

Love Bombing is simply when someone shows Love bombing it is the practice of showering someone with tons of affection and compliments in order to gain control over them and/or significantly influence their behavior. If you are the victim of a Love Bomber’s attention you will likely feel amazing and feel like you have a genuine connection with them but make no mistake their motive here is all about manipulation.

The reason is simple, once you are hooked and feel the connection with the Love Bomber there will be an abrupt switch and the real manipulation and/or abuse starts. In today’s climate the online space will be ripe for Love Bombers so make sure you take things slow with anyone, you connect with. Get to know them, don’t make any long-term plans until well after you meet face to face. The dating climate may have changed, but the dating rules have not.